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Knowledge does NOT = confidence

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I used to think that, to feel more confident and stop second-guessing myself, all I needed to do was learn MORE.Ā 

Surely, more knowledge meant less mistakes and tons of confidenceā€¦Ā 

Sadly, every year I stepped up a qualification level, which meant that people kept asking me more difficult things!Ā ...

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Feeling anxious at night

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Do you ever lie awake at night worrying about mistakes you might have madeā€¦ or how to fix a mistake you definitely DID make?Ā Ā 

Itā€™s always worse in the middle of the night.Ā 

Youā€™re too tired to see things objectively, so your worst fears have a party!Ā 

And everything seems SO true.Ā 

I used to th...

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Why havenā€™t you been fired?

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Why havenā€™t you been fired?

Good question to ANSWER if your inner-critic is going wild.Ā Ā 

Becauseā€¦. genuinely, if:Ā 

  • you make mistakes; andĀ 
  • youā€™re not as good as ā€˜themā€™; and
  • you have knowledge gaps,

ā€¦ why HAVENā€™T you been fired?Ā 

Could it be that they havenā€™t noticed, or perhaps they donā€™...

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Letā€™s talk imposter syndrome ā€¦

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Letā€™s talk imposter syndrome for a minuteā€¦

Itā€™s not a disease. It just a couple of thoughts.Ā 

Some version of:Ā 

  • Iā€™m not good enough; and
  • sooner or later, theyā€™ll figure it out.

For me, I was convinced that I wasnā€™t as good they thought I wasā€¦ and that my next mistake would make them realise...

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Fear of being seen as ā€˜arrogantā€™

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Do you ever worry about sounding ā€˜arrogantā€™?

Perhaps if someone asks you to talk about your strengths or successesā€¦

You feel the urge to minimise, give credit elsewhere, avoid the conversation entirely, or change the subject as soon as humanely possible!Ā 

And the CRAZY thing is, we often prioriti...

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Your brain is not telling the truthā€¦

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As lawyers, we are GREAT at using our ā€˜executiveā€™ brain.Ā 

Thatā€™s the part of our brain capable of reasoning and problem solving.Ā 

Let us loose analysing some complex documents or making a logical argument and we are on FIRE! Very useful. High fives all round. ā˜ŗ

But being great at that comes with ...

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Maybe they ARE smarter than you

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When I was an associate, I had a colleague who was SO smart.Ā 

He just ā€˜got thingsā€™ so quickly.Ā 

My poor imposter syndrome brain could not take it! ā˜ŗĀ 

So much compare and despair.Ā 

Constant thoughts about how much ā€˜smarterā€™ he was than me.Ā 

Untilā€¦. this magic new thought appeared in my headā€¦Ā 

Ā ...

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Panic is always a lie

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Have you ever felt panic at work?Ā 

Let me set the sceneā€¦

Youā€™re happily working away at your desk. An email pops into your inbox from a client. They point out an error in a draft doc you recently sent through. Another email immediately pops into your inbox from the partner on your team. Forwarding...

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You donā€™t need confidence

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Just a reminder that you DONā€™T need confidence to do the thing.Ā 

Confidence in doing a specific thing comes AFTER you have done it many times.Ā 

When your brain will happily send you thoughts like:

  • I know exactly what to do.
  • I know the answer.

If youā€™re doing something new or challenging or ...

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Creating sustainable working habits this year

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HeyĀ {{first_name}}

Would you like to go into this year creating more sustainable habits at work?

Ā 

Perhaps youā€™d like to leave the office at a reasonable hour more often. Maybe you want to create more time to go to the gym, see friends or go on that dateā€¦

Ā 

Sounds reasonable.Ā 

Ā 

So why arenā€™t...

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